Gramps

I wonder what 

You said to me the first time you saw me 

You were twice my age when they put me in your arms 

And ever since you've told the world I'm your birthday gift 

Was your hair still red then at all? 

Over and over and over you ask me when

When am I going to make you a great grandchild 

And over and over and over again I tell you you have many years left that I don't have to yet 

Over and over and over again you ask me to simply stop over unannounced and I don't do it 

I always call

I always plan

It took Henry dying for me to change my schedule so that twice a month I can see you 

Twice a month I plan it 

Because otherwise I don't see how it'll

Happen and I just hope for more time someday in the future to play that game of cards we've been taking about since December 

2. 

And now they find that somewhere in you cancer has placed itself 

And even though I've know for years this day would come 

How can I explain to you how sad it makes me that I've never been what I wish I could be for you

That I'm sorry I never have the time for what I want 

That I wish over and over that you know how much I love you and That I'm worried my grief is more about what I can't give you and all this guilt then for what you must be going through inside